Now, a couple days ago I posted a rather angry, frustrated post about the nasty stinking lemons that life was throwing my way. Without going into detail about what it was that happened, I can say that it had the very real potential to change the course of my life, and not for the better. It was the kind of news that you know, deep in the pit of your stomach, is coming. When the person telling you starts telling it, you feel your stomach, flipping and churning, your mind is not even listening to the words being said, you are making silent prayers in your head saying, "Please don't let them say THAT" "Please let it be something else" "Please, God, Please don't let this be happening". But it is to no avail, the dreaded words come forth anyway, and then the sinking feeling hits. Your stomach lurches. You can't even speak. One, because you really don't know what to say, and two, because if you do, you will only cry or curse or scream. Sadly for me, I was at work when this happened. I had to hold it together until the end of my shift when I could go out to my van and just sit there, head resting on the steering wheel, crying. Driving home, trying to see between tears. Wondering what I should actually do. Or if I should do anything at all. Wondering what the other people involved were going to do or would want me to do. It was confusing, and upsetting.
But now, a few days later. Things have been discussed. Decisions have been made. Things are being planned and life is going on. It still has the potential to change the course of my life. But not as profoundly as first thought. At least for now that is what we are thinking. It could change on a moments notice. But I have faith that things will work out the way I am being told they are. It has become but a minor setback in the original plan, but, what is life if there are no setbacks, right? I think we finally have lemonade....anyone want a glass???