Sunday, August 28, 2005

Time to buy the school supplies

This is such a bittersweet time of year. Summer vacation is over, the leaves are turning colour, the days are getting shorter. All sort of meloncholy. Except, the kids are going back to school!!!!! YEAH!!!! No more day long bickering fests. No more, "He's looking at me". No more, "I'm bored!" Ahhhhhh, the joys of fall.

But there is one more task to do before we send them off to be someone else's problem for 6 hours a day. We have to go buy the school supplies. I did this yesterday, without my children. I am always amazed at the parents who take their children with them for this task. I swear they spend at least double what they need to. The child always NEEDS the Scooby Doo notebooks or the Disney Princess pencils. Not my kids. I go, I take the supply list, I get what it asks for. No where on the list does it say you NEED the Bratz lunch box. My kids never seem to be upset by this, they accept it and are fine. Of course, I usually throw in one "cool" item. This year it was the Barbie pencil case for my daughter. You would think I was mom of the year. My 14yr old son complained that he didn't get the Barbie pencil case, so I did offer to buy him one today. He is such a comedian. I should do it, just for fun.

I never have quite understood the school supply list that well though. When I went to school (my gawd that makes me sound old), the list said:

- notebooks
- pencils
- crayons
- erasers

and that was it. Now, they list the brand of pencil crayons and the size of package to buy. They specify wide ruled notebooks or white erasers. They ask for CALCULATORS!!!!! My son's teacher asked for 1500 pages of loose leaf paper. Now, I can't talk for other kids, but I KNOW my son will not take that many pages of notes in Grade 5.

As for school clothes, I have never been one to buy a whole new wardrobe for the kids for school. Mostly since they either find out the first day that everything they picked out is now out of style, or they out grow it in a month. Of course, having boys has made this much easier....since most boys really don't give a rat's petootie what they are wearing. Hell, they don't even care if it is clean. Jeans and T-shirts are pretty easy. As for my daughter, she is still young enough that she doesn't have to have the latest designer fashions. Thank you God for blessing me with only one daughter. I don't think my bank account could survive more than that. I love her dearly, but I fear that in the next few years, her full potential for Diva-hood will be revealed.

Now, what the hell do I pack in their lunches this year?

Thursday, August 04, 2005

Sometimes you are the windshield, sometimes you are the bug

Either way, it pretty much sucks.

I do not understand what makes being the windshield seem to be so appealing. Yes, you are big and strong. You resist the forces of nature. Even if you are cracked, you can still get your job done. You are protective to those who stand behind you. But none of that changes the fact that you are usually covered in the dried, hollow corpses of the bugs that have come up against you. You are filthy and nasty. No amount of windshield wiper fluid ever makes you feel clean. There is always some nastiness around the edges.

I think I have actually known some windshields in my life.

On the other hand, you can be the bug. Your life is carefree. You fly and flit from place to place doing what bugs are supposed to do. Maybe you are looking for a beautiful field of fresh smelling wild flowers to do some cross pollunating. Or, you are looking for a warm steaming fresh pile of dung to feast on. You enjoy your spot in life and gladly carry out your business........until you happen across that highway.........then thing you know, your brains are leaking out of your ass.

I definitely know I have had days like this.