Wednesday, March 23, 2005

Getting in touch with your inner bitch

Apparently a lot of people are not only in touch with their inner bitch, they are communicating on a daily basis. She is not just an acquaintance who is invited to only the biggest of affairs, but is the best sister-friend to whom they are attached at the hip. They shop together, they work together, they go to their kids soccer games together. She seems to make an appearance EVERYWHERE!

My inner bitch didn't reveal herself until I was much older. Though my mother may claim that she was around a lot when I was a teenager. Because of that, she and I are not very close. She does show up when she is needed.....and this makes her an invaluable friend to have. When I am being threatened emotionally, she is usually right there to defend me. If I am being screwed over on a bill, she is right there to state my case. But for the most part, she stays quiet and out of sight. She USUALLY doesn't come to work with me, and I do not think my husband has ever met her.

My ex-husband, on the other hand, claims he was married to her.

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So why do so many feel the need to have their inner bitches front and center all of the time? My guess is that they are feeling threatened or screwed all of the time. I know someone who never leaves her inner bitch at home. Sometimes you think to yourself, "Ah, the IB is finally taking a day off" when WHAMO, she shows herself in all her glory. Now, granted, there are times when she definitely less flamboyant than others, but she is always there, lurking, waiting for a moment to pounce.

I am thinking maybe I need to introduce my inner bitch to her inner bitch and see who wins. A battle of the century. Mine will win, she isn't near as war weary as hers.

I think maybe my IB may have written parts of this post.

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